Jay Decay

Today I went dining at a Chinese food place in Patchogue, NY. An elderly woman i

Sun, 4 Apr 2010 00:00:00 GMT

Today I went dining at a Chinese food place in Patchogue, NY. An elderly woman in a dress struggled to open the restroom door, ran out of time, and urinated on the floor. She also left a drip-trail leading everywhere she walked. Me and my pal Mike watched all this in shock as we ate our food. One of the foods I ordered were deep-fried apples, which were unusual to me but delicious.

I was supposed to send the gold master CD of the upcoming brand new 50 Ways albu

Sat, 3 Apr 2010 00:00:00 GMT

I was supposed to send the gold master CD of the upcoming brand new 50 Ways album to the pressing plant today, but another delay took place. Pisses me off! This album's been in the works since fucking June of 2007. Basically the delay is because the song titles were only encoded on the disc up to track 27, so tracks 28 through 50 were blank. After doing some research we found that it was because there is a limit on how many characters a disc can hold. Bill, the guy who is mastering my album, is getting married today and won't be able to send me another master until the end of April. I decided to have the song titles abbreviated and wait until he comes back to send the new master with all the titles encoded. No worries. Mark my words, THE ALBUM WILL BE OUT ON OR BEFORE JUNE 1st!

My favorite thing to do in the whole wide world, is to eat an entire pizza pie a

Mon, 15 Mar 2010 00:00:00 GMT

My favorite thing to do in the whole wide world, is to eat an entire pizza pie and then throw the box out the window of a moving car. I can't begin to express how good I feel after this.

The site is finally updated after a long time of nothing. I got 2 new bands I st

Sun, 7 Feb 2010 00:00:00 GMT

The site is finally updated after a long time of nothing. I got 2 new bands I started late last year that I never announced until now. Bleach Eater and Lÿnch Pigs. No sounds of either band are up yet but stay tuned because they'll hopefully be up eventually. The new 50 Ways To Kill Me album will be out in a few months if nothing goes wrong.

Send me your phone number and I'll call you.

Wed, 2 Dec 2009 00:00:00 GMT

Send me your phone number and I'll call you.

I haven't given anyone an update in a long time. Just letting you all know I'm s

Wed, 25 Nov 2009 00:00:00 GMT

I haven't given anyone an update in a long time. Just letting you all know I'm still alive. I went to the dentist today. It was the absolute worst. Now I'm about to leave to go get drunk.

I'm heading in to New York City today to get filmed for the show Rescue Me. I'll

Sun, 20 Sep 2009 00:00:00 GMT

I'm heading in to New York City today to get filmed for the show Rescue Me. I'll be playing a junkie.

In other news, Lots of 50 Ways To Kill Me performances will be coming up in the Long Island area. Keep checking the MySpace for further information on that.

I attended the Steve Wilkos Show new season premier so there is a slim chance I

Wed, 16 Sep 2009 00:00:00 GMT

I attended the Steve Wilkos Show new season premier so there is a slim chance I can be spotted in the audience. So if you're stalking me badly enough where you want to see it, it's on September 18th right after Jerry Springer.

So I was on TV the other night. It was pretty cool, if you missed it, here's a l

Tue, 4 Aug 2009 00:00:00 GMT

So I was on TV the other night. It was pretty cool, if you missed it, here's a link to see it on YouTube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0RbxjsBii0Y

Also, there will be a great Obnoxious Gas performance coming up. Here's the flyer:

Hey everyone! Long time since there's been an update! If anyone gets the channel

Tue, 4 Aug 2009 00:00:00 GMT

Hey everyone! Long time since there's been an update! If anyone gets the channel IFC (Independent Film Channel) then look out for the new episode of Z Rock this Sunday, a show I will have a small part in.

The site has been down for a while. It's back up. Hooray.

Sun, 7 Jun 2009 00:00:00 GMT

The site has been down for a while. It's back up. Hooray.

Happy new year! For me, 2008 was one of the worst years of my life. 2009 is goin

Thu, 1 Jan 2009 00:00:00 GMT

Happy new year! For me, 2008 was one of the worst years of my life. 2009 is going to be a much brighter year. I have lots of plans. Expect a brand new 50 Ways To Kill Me full length album. It's going to kick ass. I'm still going into the studio recording it every week. Hopefully it'll be out in a few months. I'll keep you all posted.

I NEED YOUR FINANCIAL HELP! Most of you don't know, that I was born with an oral

Wed, 10 Sep 2008 00:00:00 GMT

I NEED YOUR FINANCIAL HELP! Most of you don't know, that I was born with an oral anomaly called ankyloglossia. This means I can not move my tongue much or stick it out. Since I practically just admitted that I suck at performing oral sex on girls, you know how desperate I am for your help. Many babies are born with this, but usually the muscle holding the tongue down is snipped immediately right after birth (I suppose because it's the least expensive time to have it done.) I never had this done and so that is why I have somewhat of a lisp when I talk. Words with L's often come out sounding like W's. So lolly pop would sound like wolly pop. It's embarrassed me my entire life. 50 Ways To Kill Me is currently in the process of recording a new record. I'm trying to make the lyrics as clear as possible but because of my condition, I feel some lines of lyrics are just a bit too unintelligible. I won't mention names but Record labels have dicked me around a bit too much for me to feel comfortable handing the material to someone else, this album is my baby. I feel I must release it myself and my budget for this release, what I have saved up, is 2500$. For 2500$ I can press it and it'll have a rather small booklet. Because of my lack of clearness in the vocals, it's important for me for the booklet to contain an additional 4 panels (2 more pages-front and back) to squeeze in all the lyrics. These additional pages are going to make the release cost over 3000$ (mostly because of the damn shipping to my location, paper weighs a lot). So, I need financial help from fans if you'd like to see a lyric booklet in the release. Now like I said, I've been dicked around by labels so I don't have any merchandise to put on sale, but I'm selling some stickers that I'd like you all to buy. I have 50WTKM stickers, Obnoxious Gas stickers, and political stickers that are for a good message, that you can FEEL GOOD about sticking everywhere. Also, I can't PROMISE because it's going to be hard enough to fit all lyrics to all 50 songs on 4 small CD booklet panels, but if you buy stickers I would LIKE TO have your name listed in the special thanks list in the CD!! I suppose the more you buy the more likely I'll put you in here. But even if you're NOT listed in the booklet, I will personally write you a letter of thanks with your sticker orders. Thank you so much for listening. I really love all you guys, whether you've been a fan of 50WTKM since 1999 when I started out or I added you on MySpace or some shit and just recently heard of it, I really love all you killme-heads and to give something back I'd like a release with all the goddamn lyrics included so you don't have to be in front a computer on the lyrics section of 50WaysToKillMe.com to know what the songs about! Also I'd like to add, that right here on JayDecay.com on the main page there is a donate button and if anyone donates 250 dollars or more I will send you one thousand stickers (may take up to 2 months to print) if you want me to.

I forgot to mention this when it was actually news but the other day Obnoxious Gas finished our promo video for one of our tracks. Check it out on JayTube.

I just ate a whole bag of Goldfish crackers (6 servings) in 5 minutes. Now I fee

Sun, 31 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT

I just ate a whole bag of Goldfish crackers (6 servings) in 5 minutes. Now I feel like shit.

This Saturday, the 23rd of August, 2008. 50 Ways To Kill Me

Wed, 20 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT

This Saturday, the 23rd of August, 2008. 50 Ways To Kill Me will be performing at a party in East Setauket, NY.

August, 23 2008 @ The Cabin 3 Cabin Lane, East Setauket, New York 11733 Cost : 3$ and there will be a Keg of beer. 21+

The weekend after that, Obnoxious Gas will be performing at a party in Huntington Station, NY.

August, 29 2008 15 6th avenue, Huntington Station, New York 11750 Cost : 5$

Lots of other bands and special guests will be at both parties. I'm sure there will be plenty of sex and drugs so if you're into that sort of thing feel free to show up.

Hello everyone. Unfortunately, I still don't know when the episode of Law & Orde

Wed, 13 Aug 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Hello everyone. Unfortunately, I still don't know when the episode of Law & Order that I was on will air. All I do know for certain is that it was the "Criminal Intent" series. It's not worth watching every episode just to spot me but if you happen to be a fan of the show anyway, look for me in the background getting out of a taxi cab when a guy gets arrested in front of an airport. I may also appear in other scenes involving the airport (assuming I made the cut, it's possible I didn't even make it into the episode). Yesterday I went into New York City to shoot for a television show called Life on Mars. This is not the same version as the Life On Mars BBC Programme, this is the ABC remake. The episode I'm on (which is the first episode of the first season of this U.S. version of the show) will premiere on Fox 5 at 10:00pm (9:00 central) on October 9th, which coincidentally is the birthday of the girl that I wrote the first 50 Ways To Kill Me songs for. Every year I am sad on that day so if I didn't make the cut and I don't see myself I'll be sad. If I made the cut and made it past editing and am still in it, then you'll see me in the first or second scene as a hippie carrying a conga drum. The day was so boring. We filmed my part between 4:00am and 2:00pm. The reason that took so long is because every time it would rain we'd have to go under an awning and wait for it to stop. After that finally finished, I sat in the holding room bored until about 6:30pm. I asked them if I could go for a walk because I was so bored and they let me. On the five minute walk I encountered some interesting people like Stza (the singer for Leftover Crack), and a man on a skateboard who recognized me from a 50 Ways to Kill Me / Kenneth Keith Kallenbach Band show in Philadelphia that he was at and he stopped me on the street and asked if I was that guy. When I returned back to the holding room and they finally let me go, I walked all the way from East Village to Penn Station and I accidentally walked a few blocks too far and if that wouldn't have happened I wouldn't have missed my first train back home. There was an old man playing keyboard and he had these little dolls of black girls on the top of the keyboard taped on that would dance for periods of 30 seconds and every time they would stop he'd continue to play keyboard with one hand and with the other hand turn the dancing dolls back on. He was truly amazing and I put a dollar in his basket. A crackhead asked me for change while I was watching this man play keyboard. She told me a story about being pregnant and being stranded and just needing to get home. It was so obvious that she was lying and just wanted drugs. I gave that cunt a dollar just to get out of my face. Less than 30 seconds later I had an instinct to check the "Coin Return" on a payphone and I found a quarter. Later on, a man who smelled like alcohol started talking to me about random bullshit and then asked if I had any spare change. I gave him a dollar. Later on, a guy told me he was stranded and needed 3 more dollars for a train ticket. I gave him a quarter and less than 30 seconds later I found a quarter on the ground. These people need to just look harder as opposed to harassing me! Anyway, I finally got home at 12:30am the next day. It was such a long stressful day.

Today I was filmed for a very short scene for the TV show "Law & Order: Criminal

Wed, 23 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT

Today I was filmed for a very short scene for the TV show "Law & Order: Criminal Intent", but after the shooting I forgot to ask when the episode airs. I can't even find out online because I didn't ask the name of the episode or for the episode number. If I find out the info, I'll announce it.

I will be performing solo at O'Briens on Thursday the 17th of July at 11:00 pm.

Tue, 15 Jul 2008 00:00:00 GMT

I will be performing solo at O'Briens on Thursday the 17th of July at 11:00 pm. Just me playing keyboard and singing 50 Ways To Kill Me songs. There is no cover charge, but you must be at least 21 years of age to enter so if you're a kid, bring a fake ID. Come get drunk with me.

O'Briens Pub
3720 Route 112
Coram, NY 11727

New anti-cop sticker added to the store. Buy one, why no

Fri, 13 Jun 2008 00:00:00 GMT

New anti-cop sticker added to the store. Buy one, why not?

I've been in the studio alot lately working on new 50 Ways

Sun, 1 Jun 2008 00:00:00 GMT

I've been in the studio alot lately working on new 50 Ways To Kill Me material.

I am sad to announce that my friend and band mate Kenneth Keith Kallenbach has d

Mon, 28 Apr 2008 00:00:00 GMT

I am sad to announce that my friend and band mate Kenneth Keith Kallenbach has died a few days ago. Heres a few articles I found about it online. They're all pretty much the same shit, just take your pick:

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,352649,00.html

http://www.baltimoresun.com/entertainment/news/bal-lifestyle-stern0425,0,7287552.story

http://www.startribune.com/entertainment/18184149.html

http://www.starpulse.com/news/index.php/2008/04/25/howard_stern_regular_kenneth_keith_kalle_39

http://www.huliq.com/57795/kenneth-keith-kallenbach-dead

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2008/04/25/entertainment/e141901D44.DTL